Press Release – 10-14-25

The Union City Police Department has successfully captured not one, but two local Hamburglars after a daring (and deeply misguided) freezer break-in at the Union City Help Center.

Officers responded to a call reporting that someone had broken into the Help Center’s freezer and stolen a significant amount of meat. After a thorough investigation — and a few cheesy jokes along the way — officers identified the suspects as Juan Anguiano and Justin Flint, both of whom, after being grilled by investigators, admitted to committing the crime.

The two were arrested and booked into the Randolph County Jail, where they’ll have plenty of time to chew over their decisions. The duo didn’t wear striped shirts or carry cartoon hamburgers, but the resemblance to the infamous McDonald’s Hamburglar was uncanny — right down to the appetite for beef.

As the investigation unfolded, it also became apparent that Flint may have had his hands in more than just the freezer — he’s suspected of a series of recent vehicle break-ins as well. Apparently, when he wasn’t on a beef binge, he was out trying to pick up a few “side dishes” from unlocked cars.

This was definitely not a happy meal for them. They thought they could beef with the law, but we caught them before things got too rare.

Both Anguiano and Flint are facing multiple charges stemming from their crimes. The case has officially been closed — medium-well.

The Union City Police Department would like to thank the community for your help in identifying and locating these Hamburglars. Your cooperation and support keep our city safe and ensure that the only hamburgers being stolen around here are from fast-food drive-thrus — legally purchased, of course.

Stolen were the following items:

315lbs of Hamburger and Sausage

2 boxes if wix pies – 8 pies inside each box

1 box of hotdogs with 36 inside

24 packs of bacon

24 loafs of bread